Jess Haines is a formidable person and an amazing author, so whenever I organize an event close to one of her release date I must invite her! Her characters are always volunteer for interesting stories, so make sure you don’t miss that one, to celebrate Stalking The Others’ release!
Guest Post: The H&W Gang Talk About Summer Camp
By Jess Haines
Hello there! Jess Haines here. I’m the author of the urban fantasy H&W Investigations series (HUNTED BY THE OTHERS, TAKEN BY THE OTHERS, DECEIVED BY THE OTHERS, and the recently released STALKING THE OTHERS).
The H&W Investigations team are going to discuss their memories of summer camp. Take it away, guys!
Shiarra: I remember the first time I went to summer camp. I was covered in ticks by the end of the first day.
Sara: Eww, yuck! I never went to that kind of summer camp. It was always ballet or painting or deportment classes for me.
Arnold: Your parents didn’t know anything about you, did they?
Sara: Not really. They were both business professionals and didn’t have a lot of time for me or my sister.
Chaz: My dad tried to get me into one of those sports camps once, but when I started showing signs of turning Were, he had to pull me out.
Royce: We never had such a thing when I was a teen. Most of my summers were spent tending crops.
Shiarra: You? A farmer?
Royce: Is it that hard to believe?
Arnold: Never took you for the type to get your hands dirty. Not that way, anyway.
Chaz: He probably wouldn’t now. These days, I bet you couldn’t get him to touch a potted plant with those manicured hands of his.
Royce: At least I wouldn’t piss on the ornamental tree in the corner to mark my territory.
Shiarra: Boys, boys, boys! Enough!
Sara: We’re supposed to be talking summer camp, not snarking at each other.
Arnold: Vampires and werewolves. Cats and dogs. Need I say more?
Chaz: Nobody asked your opinion, sparky.
Arnold: Hey, you don’t like being called a dog, I don’t like being called a spark. We clear?
Chaz: Yeah, yeah.
Shiarra: Now. Summer camp. Ahem.
Sara: I always wanted to tell ghost stories around a fire. Never got to do that as a kid.
Arnold: It’s overrated. Those stories never scared me.
Shiarra: S’mores are pretty good, though.
Shiarra: I keep forgetting you never would have tried modern food. That’s a real tragedy. S’mores are these godly little finger foods you make by the campfire. Toasted graham crackers, chocolate, and marshmallows.
Sara: Oh, man. Now I’m craving some.
Royce: I can eat small amounts of food, but I don’t know that they taste the same to me as they do to you. Nor do I get any nutrition out of it.
Arnold: My, I feel so educated and enriched. My day is complete.
Royce: I don’t appreciate your sarcasm, mage.
Sara: Well, I didn’t know, so I don’t mind. It’s not like vampires talk about this kind of stuff every day.
Shiarra: It’s sorta gross if you think about it. I mean… where does it go?
Royce: I’m not quite sure I understand what you’re asking.
Arnold: Do we really want to understand what she’s asking?
Shiarra: Oh, shush. Royce, you said you don’t get any nutrition out of it, right? I mean, vampires drink blood. Duh. So… uh… what does your body do with it?
Royce: That’s not exactly a conversation for polite company, Ms. Waynest.
Arnold: Okay. Campfire story material right there.
Chaz: Yeah, I’m with you on that. Ugh.
Sara: Nightmare material. I don’t think I’m going to be able to sleep tonight.
Shiarra: Sorry. Sometimes my mind wanders to weird places. It’s like that thing with hotdogs and hotdog buns.
Chaz: You lost me.
Arnold: Me too.
Shiarra: Oh, come on, you know that old mystery about why hotdogs come in packs of ten and buns come in packs of eight? Didn’t you guys ever wonder that when you were sitting around the fire at summer camp?
Sara: Oh, yeah. Why is that?
Arnold: Beats me.
Chaz: I never noticed.
Royce: You people think about the strangest things.
Chaz: Not “you people”. Maybe they do.
Sara: I don’t mind being considered a “you people”. I’d rather think about weird stuff than never question anything about my environment.
Shiarra: The down side to that is a complete inability to turn off the questions that should probably never be asked.
Sara: Amen to that.
Chaz: How come you never asked me anything about what it’s like being a werewolf, then?
Shiarra: Probably because I never had the chance to after I found out. With all the weird crap going on and you lying to me all the time, I didn’t exactly trust you to tell me anything about yourself or your pack.
Chaz: Stay out of this!
Arnold: Hey, just sayin’.
Royce: Werewolves are a shifty lot. Better not to put your trust into them.
Sara: Ha! I see what you did there.
Shiarra: Hehe. That was pretty clever.
Chaz: Oh, yeah. Laugh at the vampire’s jokes. Just wait. He’ll turn on you. Walking corpses always do.
Err, right. As you can see, these guys probably wouldn’t do so great sharing a bunch of s’mores around a campfire together. Did you ever go to summer camp and share stories around a campfire? What were your favorite scary stories as a kid?
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Thanks again for having me, Tynga!
More about Stalking the Others:
Vampires, werewolves, mages–the Others are very real, and wreaking havoc in Shiarra Waynest’s life. But now, she’s returning the favor…
Once, she was one of the good guys–or as close as a New York P.I. can get. Then Shiarra Waynest was drawn into the world of the Others. Every faction has its own loyalties and agenda. And Shia’s recent betrayal by her ex-boyfriend means that she may be on the verge of becoming a rogue werewolf at the next full moon.
Of course, with all the threats against her, Shia’s not sure she’ll live long enough to find out. The enigmatic vampire Royce wants her back in his clutches, as do two powerful werewolf packs, along with the police. Instead of going into hiding, Shia is enlisting the aid of her enchanted hunter’s belt and every dirty P.I. trick she knows. If she’s going down, she’ll take out as many of her enemies as she can–and hope that in the process, she keeps whatever humanity she has left…
Kensington is offering one copy of Stalking The Others to one lucky winner!
To enter the giveaway, fill out the Rafflecopter form below.
Open to US & Canada
Ends Wednesday, August 5th, 2012
(like all of our Paranormal Summer Camp giveaways)
More books by Jess:
“I’m a displaced New Yorker with a penchant for the silly, the obscure, and the fantastical. Los Angeles is home for the time being, since it consistently meets my daily quota of strange. I’m currently working on the H&W Investigations urban fantasy series. Find out more about Shiarra Waynest, drop me a line, or join my mailing list at www.jesshaines.com!”
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